I could probably make this a list of 100 of my top personal tips, as I’m always trying to intuit and think of new ways to offer helpful pointers, but that would certainly be far too lengthy to read through! So I thought it would be good to at least start with 10 of my favorite personal tips, hopefully to be of some assistance in your journey. I’ve tried to work with a list here that I truly believe in my heart will work for everyone who may read this writing.
1 – Take care of your physical body
It’s hard to overemphasize just how important our physical bodies are to us. Besides being the temple of the divine creator, our body is the sole vehicle to maneuver through this plane, experience what we have come here to work through, facilitate our lessons and anchor ourselves. It is through our physical bodies that all of these things come into being and manifestation.
I remember seeing an infomercial by Tony Little, the personal trainer. What he said at one point really stuck with me. I may be paraphrasing slightly, but the following quote is close to verbatim: “Take care of your body, as it is the only one you’ll ever have,” he boldly stated. Think of it – just how many of us take our bodies for granted: overeating, smoking, drinking, doing drugs, not getting enough sleep, eating terrible diets of greasy fast food, and not exercising. For those of us who are in one way or another physically self destructive to our bodies, there may be a sense of carelessness, laziness, and non-appreciation for the all that God has gifted us with. Many people treat their homes with more respect than their singular, non-replaceable sacred physical attributes.
If you don’t use your body or parts of your body, it may stop functioning properly and shut down. There is that great law of the universe, the law of use, which speaks to the concept of: we must use something to keep it functioning properly. It is so important to utilize every aspect of your body in a positive way, as every part of it is there for a reason – a divine reason.
For any of us who are physically able to exercise, it is vital to a positive life in this earthly existence. As I do myself, I recommend for everyone to make physical exercise at the top of their “to do” list on a regular basis.
But a more tricky, even insidious part of this above mentioned problem of physical neglect is that many people get so wrapped up into the spiritual side of things: meditating, contemplating, trying to enhance intuition, that the physical body gets overlooked, as if it is somehow lower than our spiritual selves. This is not a good attitude at all! First, if our bodies are sick or not functioning properly, it is quite problematic to develop the spiritual side of things in a successful, harmonious way. Besides that, why would anyone want to deny a part of who we are and how we are divinely created? If you have the blessing of two eyes, why would you only want to use or take care of one?
With a healthy body, our spiritual selves are also able to grow and flourish! Celebrate your body! Be proud of it, and make the most of whatever fantastic features and qualities you have! Never declare that you or your body is ugly, as your physical self will then pick up these words, carry out your declarations and become truly “ugly.” Affirm out loud on a regular basis: My physical body is a divine gift from God, perfect in every way!
2 – Be at peace with the past
I have sometimes reflected on the concept that for many of us, getting older simply means more and more negative unresolved baggage from our past keeps building up and accumulating in our lives and within us making the quality of our lives worse and worse through time…
For many of us, the pain of the past just keeps getting larger and heavier throughout time, like strapping a sack of potatoes on our backs, and continuing to add more potatoes in that sack regularly. After a while, how hard would it be for any of us to just keep on walking?
I have always been a firm believer in diligently working on being at peace with the past and I myself work on this everyday. Consider that negative feelings based on the past never just sit within us like stagnant water in a clogged up sink as we may like to believe; they build, grow, mutate, and like a cancer, continue to spread through us and poison our lives.
First, whatever you’ve been through: Loss in love, failed relationships, loved ones and family dying, dreams not manifesting, poverty, illness or any other difficult experience, understand that it’s not as important what actually happened, as how you feel about what happened. As you’re working through the emotions: anger, resentment, fear, loathing, sadness, hurt, rejection, alienation or any negative feelings, try to see whatever positive may have come out of that experience. This is a great place to start the healing process. I really like the concept of: There is something divine that comes out of all experiences! By focusing on whatever greater good may have come out of the past, we have a guiding light out of our own darkness to the peace and resolution that all of us internally yearn for.
Working through the negative feelings of what came before and being at peace with the past is not accomplished overnight. As you’re trying to look at it all in a positive way, old emotions and defense mechanisms fight back: “No one knows what I’ve been through,” you might declare. But in reality, everyone does indeed know exactly what you’ve been through. We have all lost, suffered, seen people die, been disappointed and cried. The names and places differ, but the underlying theme is always the same. The pain is truly universal.
With this understanding, we learn to see how all of us are literally in the same boat, even though our pain can make us feel completely separated from everyone and everything. But by seeing how it is all connected, we develop a sense of empathy and compassion for others and ourselves. These spiritual Godsends assist in the healing process as well. If we can feel this for others and ourselves, we can ultimately build empathy and compassion for those specifically who may have hurt us. This helps bring us full circle, out of the agony of our suffering into the light of healing and joy!
Even if the past hurts seem insurmountable, remember that every step toward peace is a step worth taking; it may take time to get there, but you can and will. Sooner or later, we shall all come to a place of peace with our past, whether in this lifetime now, later down the road, or in actual future lifetimes. The negativity we feel, no matter how real it seems, is never permanent! It is simply not who we are in origin or completion as we are not a creation of negativity and pain. We are creations of light, love; a perfect image in divine mind!
Why not pronounce that you are at peace with past right here, right now? Why suffer any longer? It all begins and completes itself with attitude, our attitude… Affirm out loud daily: I am at peace with my past and all that has happened before!
Jim Mini tip: As you are coming to peace with the past in any way, observe in the mirror how you look. I bet you’ll probably find you that you look noticeably younger and healthier.
3 — Practice gratitude and forgiveness
In all of my psychic and spiritual work, there are two practices that I unequivocally feel work for anybody, regardless of their spiritual level of evolution, intelligence, lessons to learn or any other variables. What I’m referring to here is the gifts of gratitude and forgiveness. These two “best friends” are some of the greatest medicines on earth, with absolutely no side effects! As I recommend to others, I practice gratitude and forgiveness everyday – without exception. (It’s hard to measure just how healing gratitude and forgiveness are, as their effects are endless, eternal and positive.)
With gratitude, we in effect, negate most if not all of our negative emotions. When we are indeed grateful, what is there possibly to feel bad about? Being thankful for what we do have, invites more good to come to us. Why? Because we vibrate to energy and essence; the vibration we hold within we indeed send out and what is sent out truly does come back to us. Look at what you’re vibrating to; resentment brings more to be resentful about, anger attracts violence and confrontation and sadness attracts more to be sad about. By practicing gratitude, we attract more and more to be grateful for!
If you’re not feeling particularly grateful for the hand of cards you feel the universe has dealt you, begin practicing gratitude today – this very day. Affirm out loud: I am grateful for this very day, with all of it’s endless blessings! The trick here is to start with something you can easily move toward feeling grateful for; then progress to circumstances that might feel a little tougher to be grateful for, and pronounce that you are grateful for them as well. As you progress, you’ll find yourself eventually feeling gratitude for everything. With that sense of spiritual mastery, the universe can be yours!
Forgiveness is so often misunderstood. I’ve heard many clients say to me that forgiving someone is the same thing as condoning that person’s negative actions. I’ve also heard it said that through forgiveness, one must accept a certain person back into their lives, only to get hurt again. Neither of these statements are true. Simply stated, through forgiveness, all negativity is released and set free, therefore, all parties involved are set free, allowing everyone to move peacefully forward in health, well being, peace and joy to their highest good.
Without forgiveness, negative emotions chain, handcuff and bind us to coming back together until it is worked out, until peace is achieved. These negative emotions can carry through this lifetime, as well as in future lifetimes until forgiveness is completed. Here’s a good incentive: Forgiving brings closure and relief from the pain of the past, freeing you to manifest a far better life, now and in the future!
Through forgiving another, it is not at all necessary to let them back into your life. There may be nothing positive that can be achieved through the relationship in question. I think the fear here for most of us is that forgiveness makes one vulnerable to the other person. Quite the contrary: negative emotions are what put us in jeopardy, while forgiving sets us free and lifts a ton of weight off of us, literally.
Jim mini tip: If you’re having a hard time forgiving, think of forgiveness as a self-centered investment. Why? Because forgiving others benefits you — in countless ways from better health to a happier, more fulfilling life.
4 – Do acts of kindness for others daily
Somewhere back in the 1980’s, I began trying to make a conscious effort to do one kind thing for someone a day – without wanting anything in return. It was just my quiet little thing, no muss or fuss about it. I still try and continue to do so, and encourage others in my psychic practice to do the same.
I’ve heard it said by many great spiritual masters that one of the highest callings of this existence is to do acts of kindness for others, without wanting anything in return; in a sense, to simply be of humble service to others. I completely agree. The key is to not want anything in return; that is an investment and not in the true spirit of giving. Not even a thank you or any form of approval should be desired or requested. This way, the energy is of pure spirit, unconditional love and just as our spiritual teachers guide us, give unconditionally, only to help us out and serve our needs daily, we carry forward and perpetuate the same wonderful energy to others. You might question, “Why is it good for me to give to someone else? What do I get out of it?”
The answer is – so many things: Every act of kindness raises the overall collective energy and vibration of the entire world which makes the world a better place for you and helping others elevates your energy, aligning you with the essence of unconditional blessings, which means that you will receive good back in return, (even though you should not look for anything in return.) Performing acts of kindness makes you more God-like, which elevates your spirit and helps you to evolve beyond the selfishness that is so present in the physical plane. It is all-good! Who loses here? No one!
As you perform more acts of kindness, you’ll begin to feel the energy of your act; within your intuition you’ll feel the overall feel good tingle, goodness, joy and elation that comes from serving others.
Jim mini tip: If you’re feeling down, do something kind for someone else, as it will help to get you out of your negative mood and mind set.
5 – Watch your words, thoughts, actions and choices
As any of you who have read my writings or had a personal consultation with me know, I am adamant as to how life altering our words, thoughts, actions and choices are. I continually remind others as well as myself to be aware of these above-mentioned atomic tools on a daily basis.
All four of these tools combined together largely architect the life we manifest, and yet we may take what we say, think, do and choose for granted. “This is just the way I am,” some may say.
When we are angry, we usually say things that curse our lives, and makes things worse. “Nothing ever goes right for me. I hate my life,” someone yells! Stop right there for a minute. Think of how destructive these words are, especially shouted at top volume. You would be reinforcing exactly what you don’t want to occur. These types of words should never be indulged, and if they accidentally are, immediately neutralized with an affirmation: I demand that everything now goes right for me. I love my life!” Here, we’re matching the intensity of the original anger with something positive. Just like if someone told a lie about you, you would counter it with the truth. Remember the truth is positive! Things need to always be affirmed out loud for the better.
Thoughts are much harder to control than our words, as our thoughts are interwoven into our often-complex internal process. Feelings, thoughts, images seem to come out of nowhere, and are perplexing for many if not most of us to decipher, figure out and heal. But here’s some good news: Words can be controlled, and through our words, we help to shape and reshape out thoughts. Through words that heal, bless and prosper, our thoughts can indeed become positive throughout time.
Like words, actions and choices are easier to control than thoughts. Actions and choices also help to mold our thoughts along with our words. With actions and choices, there must be something that we actually do – in that process of doing, there are many points to examine and reexamine what we may indeed be about to do.
One may fantasize about cheating on their spouse, for example. But between the initial fantasy, (thought) and the actual occurrence, (the action and choice), there are many points of potential reconsideration. Whether canceling the date, cutting off contact with the other party, one’s action and / or choice is critical to the outcome, and can be dealt with in any number of ways.
Thank God that there are so very few situations in our lives where a split second decision is ever required.
Jim mini tip: Don’t act or choose impulsively. Be ever aware of what you’re doing, and think things through before choosing your actions or making choices.
6 — Be in harmony with what you desire
So many of us want and desire something, say, a great romantic relationship. But contrary to the feelings of what one wants; there may be a diametrically opposed conflict. Past disappointment, unresolved feelings of hurt from former relationships, fear of commitment based on the concern of being hurt again are some legitimate examples of what I’m referencing here. With these sorts of emotions within, it becomes a war – and it’s a battle that no one wins! Think of it like the old adage of taking two steps forward, then two steps backward. Where did you end up? Of course, right back where you started. It’s the same thing here.
This issue has been quite confusing for many of my clients; “Jim, I know what I want, and why won’t it happen,” a frustrated person may ask? Often, the desires we feel are neutralized and negated by the fears and the emotional blocks we carry within. We tend to look only at what is on the surface of our emotions. If we feel something consciously, we tend to think that’s all there is regarding the situation, end of issue.
We cannot only send out our heart’s desire into the ether. Along with that wish, the fearful emotions also get sent out and the blocked emotions create blockages and walls, helping to prevent us from manifesting what we dream of. What do we do?
It is so important to work on both opposite ends of the spectrum; affirm what you desire most certainly, and work toward coming to peace with and releasing the past hurt, disappointments and defenses that get in the way!
This is what I mean by being in harmony with what you want. You need to be receptive to it down to the very core essence of your being. All parts of you need to be open, enthusiastic, and simply stated; feeling good about what it is that you want!
Ask yourself how you truly feel about what you are trying to manifest. Are you afraid? If so, why? Are you uncertain? Is there a sense that it is too good to be true? Gently probe, because sooner or later, your feelings will reveal themselves. Acknowledging any feelings you have that are negative, helps to dissipate these energies and clear the pathway for your heart’s desire to become a living three dimensional reality in your live!
7 — Every color of the rainbow should shine in your life
Sometimes a client may say to me, “Jim, I just want to have enough money to get by, and maybe I’m just not meant to be with anyone.”
In this instance, it’s so important to note that what we expect to come true indeed may actually happen. The client here is voicing very low expectations for themselves. With these parameters, not much will probably happen in their lives of positive note. It’s like only having one color of the rainbow (just enough money to get by), and not a very bright color at that.
First, what needs to happen for any of us who currently possess such limited dreams is to work on expanding our mindsets. Anything and everything is possible! Never lose sight of that fact. Let’s look first at opening up our finances. Enough money to “get by,” is not so good. After you’ve paid your bills, maybe you have a couple of bucks to go out to eat once in a while. Here we need to widen the concept of money to include financial miracles and enormous sums of money coming to us in a miraculous and divine way!
Then, we can replace the idea of “I’m not meant to be with anyone” to opening our hearts to receive the true divine lifelong partner who God has made just for us to build our future with. Now there are two colors of the rainbow shining brighter in the realm of possibilities.
If you think of it, why would anyone limit himself or herself in this way? The most common answer would be low self-esteem; low self-worth. Sometimes we just don’t realize how little we feel we deserve. We can get used to our own self-limited reality, and frequently something needs to hold up a mirror to us to offer an honest perspective. As mentioned above, expecting such a small amount for ourselves reveals how we have truly felt about our value, far too long.
It’s good to work on things from both the internal and external perspective: Working on healing internal low self worth helps to expand our rainbow to included all of it’s illustrious colors. What do you deserve? You deserve to have it all! Simultaneously, beginning to open the horizon to all of the blessings we deserve externally helps to bring in the brightness that is ours by birthright! Think of all areas of your life being fulfilled – and don’t believe it’s impossible, because it can and will happen for you.
Jim mini tip: Do not buy into the negative limitations many if not most people hurl at you. You can have every color and blessing of the rainbow.
8 — Put your best attitude forward always
Prior, I had written about how important attitude is – in fact, I admire what the great psychic Edgar Cayce once said: “Attitude is more important than fact.”
So much of what we experience is what we set up – we are truly navigating a great deal of our journey. I always encourage all of my clients to really put their best attitude forward, so to speak and I try my utmost to live by the same creed everyday. But attitude is often trivialized, as if it is thought of on par with the mood you’re in on a given day. But attitude is profound: it creates energy, which in turn builds motion, movement, momentum and ultimately results in our lives.
If you start the day with a bad attitude, negative things may occur from: Stress in travel, hostility in the workplace to unpleasant interactions at home. You may think it is random, but your attitude really contributed to setting it all up.
If you in turn handle the day with a great attitude you would find travel more stress free, harmony at work, and happiness at home! Simply by ones attitude, the day can manifest into something wonderful.
Life is in many ways a mirror, and the boomerangs of our attitude come back right to us with stunning and startling accuracy. I would recommend trying this exercise: Observe how you feel and where your attitude is at on any given day and what occurs on that particular day. If you really take a clear look, you’ll probably notice how the attitude you were carrying directly impacted quite literally on what you manifested: people’s attitudes toward you in return, physical occurrences and events that may have seemed at random but really weren’t…
What I’ve addressed above regarding our daily approach to living is from a deep, spiritual metaphysical point of view. The more obvious part of this is the simple idea of trying to have a good attitude always, because it is the right thing to do; it lessens the load and burden on you and others and benefits all activities this very day. All aspects of your experience can and will benefit from this practice, and the momentum of life will be so much more likely to flow in your favor.
9 – Don’t live in the past or the future – live only for today
Live for today, as today is all we have… How profound the present tense is – in fact, it is all there really is – there is no past, no future, only in the illusions of time as we know it does “before” and “later” pretend to exist. So why do so many of us live in the past and probably to a lesser degree, in the future?
The past is safe – safe from reality, chance, possibility or unpredictability. It is already over with. Therefore, nothing is really going to happen, so it becomes a safe harbor for emotions, mostly negative ones, to find solace and a false sense of comfort. The past allows us to indulge and engage in any emotional fantasy we choose…
Sadness: feeling down and blue about what never was and what didn’t turn out to be, like lingering on a failed relationship.
Regret: if only a different choice was made, if only this would have happened, possibly wishing we would have married a certain person many years ago.
Nostalgia: Ah the good old days, when things were nice and predictable, the neighbors were kinder, the world a better place…
But realize that the emotions we feel were most certainly quite different at the time. In retrospect, it’s easy to place an emotional value on the past, constructed by today’s reality, to make the past fit whatever we want it to be. Was it really so great back then? Probably not. So why do it now? Because it provides a false sense of emotional pay off, whether to wallow in self-pity, not face today, dream of what never was, or escape the challenges that are right in front of us.
From my experience as a reader, living in the future is something many of us do, but it seems to me to be less common than living in the past. What might someone “get” from living for tomorrow? Especially for those of us who have strong dreams that are yet to fulfilled, it’s easy to dwell in the future and fantasize about tomorrow:
Life will be wonderful when I finally meet him!
I can finally be happy when I’m rich!
When I get out of this job and get a new one, I can then feel good!
But here we see a dangerous pattern. As there is only power in the present tense, we completely scatter our energies and our internal resources by disconnecting from reality, and living in the past or future. The secret here is that no matter what you may or may not get, this pattern never stops based on getting the object of your desire, It is simply replaced by a new “something,” a new outcome.
We must pronounce out loud everyday that we are happy and content right now and live only for now. In the same way we wouldn’t pretend to have a different name then our real name, as it would be false, disconnecting ourselves from truth and living in yesterday or for tomorrow never brings any real happiness at all!
Affirm on a regular basis: “I am happy and content in this very moment, as all I need is right here, right now!”
Jim mini tip: Make notes of how a particular day goes, where you are not focusing on the past or the future. See if the day flows more smoothly.
10 — Affirm that everything happens in your life for the highest good
In conclusion of this first installment of my top 10 personal tips for a better life, I would like to suggest that all of us to try to look at our lives from the vantage point that everything happens for the highest good.
In the world of duality we live in: good versus evil, positive or negative, likes and dislikes, happy or sad, we get used to our emotions and lives swinging like a pendulum. Today we’re happy, tomorrow we’re sad, we get what we want so life is good but then we are soon to be disappointed… It just goes on and on with no seeming resolution to this madness. We must try and get past this illusion of opposites, as indeed, we should try and come to a place of inner peace with our lives.
This takes time, effort and putting ourselves in a state of mind of acceptance, gratitude, inner peace and seeing whatever good has come out of any situation as I’ve reiterated throughout this writing.
When we look at the seeming difficulties we’ve all experienced, we may feel left with such pain that can never be healed – but in time, all is healed. At some point in this vast and endless journey, it will ALL become OK. This is our mission as we return to the earth plane with unfinished business, lessons to learn, and spiritual mastery to gain.
For now, let us all make the sincere attempt from our hearts to see that everything happens for the highest good – to trust in supreme intelligence, to know that often, there are greater reasons for what occurs in life than we many be able to humanly see and understand. We may not know why, but we need to trust in “why it happened,” even if it is unclear to our human level of perception at this time.
Give yourself the eternal gift of peace by affirming: “All that happens in my life happens for the highest good, and I am grateful for all the universe has given me.”