Voice of the Spirit

Judge not, lest ye be judged – The Bible

The world of judgment

In the world we live in, we either judge others and/or experience it being done to us.  Everyone is more opinioned, outspoken, critical, condemning and judgmental of others than ever before.  In this age where everyone’s opinion matters, people are hardly shy about speaking up and letting the world know exactly what they think – and who they judge. 

 Just listen to the comments at work that people make about others, what your family and friends say, the opinions that are written in magazines, newspapers, and especially the information splashed all over the internet.  Judgment is everywhere. 

Take a look at cable television “news” shows were people hurl insults and condemn everyone from celebrities to politicians to ordinary folks ‘round the clock, satisfying the insatiable appetites of those who tune in.  Whether the audience disagrees and/or agrees with the pundits on the shows, it is the sense of judgment that largely brings everyone together.

Judgmental folks congregate to each other, just like the old adage, “Birds of a feather flock together.”  Whether it’s through a television “news” show or an organization such as a church where everyone is like minded, people feel strength in numbers, which further validates their viewpoint.  If everyone in a church worships Jesus, then they feel right about their beliefs and entitled to judge those who disagree.  It is tribal in nature just as it once was in the ancient jungles.  Those within the tribe (in this instance, a church) look down on and attack others who are different than them and in the most primitive sense, are from another tribe.

 And you’ll find that most people hardly ever apologize for their judgmentalness of others;  rather, they celebrate it and feel unabashedly empowered to do so!  It’s as if everyone feels entitled to express whatever their opinions are, regardless of how much they attack and hurt others.  So in the world of judgment, who is it that exactly that gets the finger pointed at them?  Is it everyone, or is that a selective process?

Who we judge

 In the world we live in where we look at things as either being right or wrong, we tend to judge those who we feel are “wrong” – and that term is not just limited to someone who commits a egregious crime such as a bank robbery.  It is as open ended as we choose to make it. While some of us have been looked down upon because of our social status, we also do the same to others.  This includes feeling superior to those with less money than us: “Oh, the neighbors don’t have nearly as much money as I do and aren’t financially together like me.  You can tell by looking at that awful car they just bought.  It’s used and at least ten years old.  It probably cost a grand total of a few hundred bucks, but hey, they just don’t have the same kind of money that I do.  It’s just a rusted out piece of junk,” a next door neighbor smugly says.

In addition, if any of you just stop and listen to what is said on television about “unattractive” or “overweight” celebrities, or what people say about their coworkers in the workplace, you’ll see just how much people who aren’t considered physically attractive are attacked and disrespected: “This guy who’s in the next cubicle over from me looks like such a dork.  I bet he hasn’t had a date in years.  No woman would ever touch him with a ten foot pole as he’s so friggin’ ugly.  I can’t stand to even look at him as it ruins my appetite for lunch,” a female coworker chuckles. 

Besides looks, there’s always the rat race in our society of who’s the most successful – and those who are considered less so are often on the receiving end of being criticized: “My brother John has not done well in his career at all, and it doesn’t look like he ever will because he just doesn’t have what it takes.  He just isn’t good enough, you know.  Thinking of it, John hasn’t even gotten one promotion in 12 years,” his brother Jason flatly states. 

On a more lofty level, we look down on people who don’t live up to our standards of morality, family, and behavior.  It’s as if we put ourselves in the role of being the judge and jury when it comes to other’s lifestyles and choices: “My daughter has never married and didn’t have kids.  What’s wrong with her as a woman?  Now it’s too late as she’s too old now.  I’m so disappointed in her,” a mother complains about her daughter. 

Sometimes the insults are far less restrained: “That guy is going straight to hell when he dies.  Not only is he a worthless drunk, but he almost killed a poor, innocent, teenage girl while driving home from a bar.  I hope he rots in prison and in hell!” a man proclaims about a drunk driver he saw on the local news.

Yet perhaps the most insidious and hard to detect form of judgment is when we verbally attack those who remind us of ourselves – of some part of us that we don’t like and that we’re hiding. 

Scott always had an aversion and revulsion of gay men and consistently condemned them.  Every time he’d see someone gay on television or in his neighborhood, the vicious insults would begin to fly: “That damn faggot is an aberration of everything that is natural – spreading disease, and corrupting innocent children.  God hates fags and I wish they would all die from AIDS!” Scott frequently yelled.  This type of attack may sound extreme and unlikely to occur in today’s world, but it’s far more common than you may think. 

Yet in Scott’s instance, it’s not just religious homophobia that is at the root of his hatred.  It’s that he himself is latently gay and has had tendencies to be sexually attracted to other men — and he hates this about himself with a passion.  So instead of facing his issues in whatever way is best for him on a personal level and coming to terms with how he feels, he turns the attack back on those who hold up a mirror to himself – those men who are openly gay.

Whether it’s a homophobic tirade by Scott, putting down someone at work for not being “hot enough,” or any in number of ways, it’s easy to look at instances of who gets judged.  Unfortunately, if we’re being honest, there are far too many endless examples to even begin to keep track of here.  With that being said, we need to look beyond just who we judge, and ask the questions of why and when we criticize and disparage others.

Why and when we judge others

It’s startling to listen to people who feel completely justified in casting judgment upon others  because they feel superior, better than, and somehow entitled to see others as “wrong.”  Whether these criticisms are said as seemingly casual comments, or blaringly loud exclamations as Scott did, it is the sense of egotism and arrogance that fuels this energy.

Yet this is nothing new, as we can trace judgment back through all of recorded history.  In the most extreme cases, people are run out of town and even put to death through being judged.  Even today, women in parts of the Middle East are stoned to death for cheating on their husbands, whether it’s provable infidelity or only an accusation.  Here, we see where finger pointing reaches a level that is quite hard to comprehend for most of us.  If you’re a woman, imagine that you could be stoned to death simply for being accused of cheating on your husband – right here, right now in today’s world!

The self righteousness becomes a smokescreen of hiding the flaws in the person or persons doing the judging.  In this instance, the sense of being “holier than thou” becomes a way of camouflaging the shortcomings that exist within all of us.  Think of it: Aren’t we all flawed, and haven’t we all made mistakes?

When criticizing others, it’s as if there is a “right” person (the one doing the judging), and a “wrong” person (the one who’s being judged).  But that energy shows an absolute absence of one of the very cornerstones we’re all here to spiritually learn, which is empathy and compassion.

Without empathy and compassion, we can sit in judgment of others day and night and never put ourselves in the shoes of those we’re looking negatively upon.  When empathy and compassion are missing, our sense of judgment has no boundaries and just continues, especially when our egos get involved in the process.  As we hurl this negativity into the ether and at people, we even sometimes alter the course of their lives in a terribly destructive way as what we say really does hurt them. This is exactly what happened to Patricia.

Patricia took a new job about a year ago, and her boss was named Tammy.  Patricia was a divorced single mother of two while Tammy was a married Evangelical Christian who strongly believed that divorce was a serious sin.  Therefore, she sat in judgment of Patricia.  Tammy immediately began putting Patricia down at work and spreading negative things about her to anyone within earshot.

She said things like, “Patricia just doesn’t seem to get the hang of this job at all.  She’s lazy and not a very good worker.”  Then she’d follow up with, “Oh my God, I am so worn out as I have to do Patricia’s work all the time, as she’s just not capable at all.  Jesus help me as I’m so sick of her!”  After months of this, people started to believe what Tammy was saying, and the backlash against Patricia began building.

However, none of what Tammy said was true as Patricia was in fact an excellent worker.  It was just that Tammy had a hard time with the fact that Patricia was a divorced woman, and in Tammy’s mind, that was dead wrong.

So after about six months of Tammy’s repeated verbal slurs, Patricia ended up being fired, all supposedly because of her inferior work performance.  Here we see how the judgment Tammy felt toward Patricia altered her life forever.  She lost her job and was out of work for six months, which caused her and her children to experience great financial hardship.

As with Tammy and Patricia, it’s so easy for any of us to get caught up in the flow of putting others down and unloading on them because we feel justified in how we view them.  Plus, we supposedly feel relieved by releasing these negative energies and by getting it all out.  We falsely assume that since we believe we’re superior to others, what we’ve done is absolutely ok!

 However, this is a complete illusion.  Instead of putting others down and making it righteous in our own minds, what we should doing is asking ourselves this most important question: “If I judge others, what happens to me in the process?”

To judge others is to judge ourselves

 To whatever degree you judge others, is the same degree that you judge yourself. – Jim1537

 When we judge others, the joke is really on us from a spiritual perspective.  First, we don’t feel good about ourselves if and when we condemn others because if we were at peace with ourselves, we wouldn’t find the need to attack others at all.  Judging others is reflective of our exact relationship with ourselves and the degree we judge and the way we do so clearly reveals exactly how we really feel who we are inside.  And the more we point out what’s wrong with others, the worse we feel within.  Think of it this way:  for every judgment you think or say is the same thing as putting a dose of poison in your bloodstream.

It’s not just an abstract concept that is lofty and in the clouds, but metaphysically quite clear and correct.  When we judge others, we attract judgment to ourselves, just as whatever we do comes back to us. 

Even if we don’t have it in our hearts to stop criticizing others based on empathy and compassion, we must end it if just for the sake of our physical health, general well being, and self preservation.  Of course, none of us like being judged, yet as long as we do so ourselves, we will continue to attract this awful energy back to us.

A perfect example of this happened to a musician named Colin who never had a good thing to say about any other artists he knew.  He condemned virtually every musician he was “friends” with, calling their work boring, predictable, uninteresting, and second rate. 

So when Colin did a performance of his own, the feedback came in quickly and swiftly:  “Boring, uninteresting, and predictable,” was what one critic stated.  Then, a different critic actually referred to Colin’s show as “Second rate.” 

However, did these jabs come from the people Colin had attacked himself?  Not at all.  The same words Colin said about others came back to him from completely different sources, and not those who Colin knew.  Because he sent out this energy into the universe, it was brought back to him, yet not from those who Colin had hurled his insults at.

From a deeper point of view, let’s look at a scenario much bigger and vaster than Colin’s.  When we judge others, we sometimes have to actually reincarnate in a future lifetime in the exact same shoes of those we’ve condemned before.  Why?  To experience firsthand what we did to them.  It may be the only way we can learn from what we’ve done through our judgment of others.

When Cindy was just a little girl, she began mocking other children in school right to their faces who had speech impediments.  She would mimic their sounds, exaggerate their speech problems, contort her face and just laugh all day long, thinking their issues were just hilarious.  As an adult, she never outgrew this practice and continued to verbally mock those who had speech impediments, as if she was performing a comedy routine.  Trying to mimic their every sound and chuckling all the way, she devoted her entire life to making fun of those who couldn’t speak properly and just thought it was a blast to do so.

Little did she realize that she was setting herself up for who and what she would reincarnate as in her next lifetime, because when she came back into this world, she was born with a lifelong speech impediment.  In this instance, she needed to experience what she had done to others and how she had hurt them, as it was the only way for her to spiritually grow past this and come to terms with what she did prior.

This is in no way to say that those who are born with a disability have done something before to “bring it on,” as there are many spiritual and karmic reasons as to why any of us reincarnate in a certain way.  It’s just that in certain instances, we literally do come back into this world in a future lifetime in the very same shoes of those we have judged before!   

Yet all of us have made mistakes and we have all looked down on others.  However, that doesn’t mean that there’s an indelible black mark on our souls which will lead to severe spiritual punishment now and/or in the future.  It means that we need to let go of the madness of judging others!  Yet as a culture, we’re so entrenched in judgment as a daily way of life, that how do we begin to do this?  Here are some great tips, insights, exercises and affirmations to achieve that very goal for you!

Instead of judging others, try blessing them instead

First, try this exercise for one to two days: Have a note pad and a pen/pencil and write down how many times you judge anyone else or hear others do the same.  In addition to what you think and say about others that is disparaging, include the words of coworkers, family, friends, and anything you hear on television or read in the media that criticizes someone else.  This could range from anything such as a cynical comment or a nasty remark about someone’s appearance, all the way to a declaration that someone deserves to die!  I bet you’ll be surprised how many times you judge or observe others doing so, all in a matter of a day or two.

Then, look at all of the judgments you’ve recorded, and realize that you shouldn’t be asking yourself if the criticisms are justified, right, or correct.  Keep in mind that you can always find fault in anyone if and when you want to.  It’s like the old cliché: If you’re looking for it, you’ll find it. 

Instead, ponder these questions: Who am I to judge anyone else?  Am I God?  If that doesn’t make you want to relinquish judgment, remember that from a spiritual perspective that all of us have committed the most horrific acts imaginable in one lifetime or another – and that includes murder.  Yes, we have all murdered, so who are we to look down on anyone else?

Remember that in the big scheme of things, you’re just like the person you’re judging.  It begs the question we should all ask ourselves, “Why are my actions any better than anyone else’s?”  With that in mind, it’s clear that we are all the same, so how could we disparage anyone else?  That just means that we’re attacking ourselves.

Even though we’ve committed the most primitive animalistic acts against others in prior lifetimes, we’re now at a point in our spiritual evolution where we’re supposed to be getting past such things.  And part of that growth means for us to learn to not judge others.  This process helps us to become humbled, and with humility, comes the freedom and power of not judging!

Yet, if you’re still feeling compelled to view others as wrong, never forget for a moment that to judge others is to judge ourselves – literally.  Even it’s merely for the sake of self preservation, it is far too costly to judge because of the way others will treat us in return. 

In addition, we can’t afford the penalty our body pays for being a part of such an ugly and dark energy, and the toll it takes on our finances helps to bring us into poverty as well.  Remember that projecting an ugly energy into the atmosphere brings it right back to us – and it can affect our lives in any number of ways.  Ultimately, we lose our connection to the love and light that is so necessary to bring in the blessings we divinely deserve when we harm others through judgment. 

Instead of judging others, the solution is to bless them, which releases not only them, but you, to the highest and greatest good.  This process also helps to heal your life.  Start with someone you judge who you don’t know, like a celebrity you’ve looked down upon.  (One recent example that comes to mind is how people in droves attacked singer/actress Jessica Simpson because she gained some weight.)  Whether it’s Jessica or someone else, think of a celebrity or someone you don’t know you’ve disparaged. 

Now, insert that person’s name in the blank space and say out loud: “I no longer judge ________.  I now bless them and release them to their highest good!  Say it repeatedly and feel it in your heart – and you’ll see how much lighter and happier you’ll become!  The reason I started with someone you don’t know or a celebrity, is because it’s not personal in nature, therefore, it’s easier to do.

Next, work toward blessing someone who has personally hurt you, whether it was being jilted by a lover, friend, coworker and/or family member.  Instead of judging them, bless them by affirming: I release all hurt, pain, and judgment toward _____________ and bless them with positive wishes for their complete happiness.  Through blessing them, you release however the former situation is holding you back from manifesting good things in your life today.

Last but not least, take a person who is publicly acknowledged as a horrible person.  This could be a serial killer, rapist, dictator, and/or child molester.  These people are so easy to condemn as they have caused an incalculable amount of hurt to others – and even to entire nations. 

However, instead of judging them, release them to their highest good and bless them by affirming: As it is not my place to judge anyone, I bless and release __________to their highest and greatest good!  Now, you’ll start feeling somewhat better and assume that you’re done.  After all, could it be harder to forgive someone other than a mass murderer?  “What could be possibly tougher than that?” you might ask. 

Yet, it can be even more difficult to no longer judge someone else – a person you may have never thought you had to stop judging – someone you may have long believed you were ok with…and that person is you.  The biggest challenge is to no longer judge yourself.  You may not think you’re doing it, but remember, if you judge others, you are also doing the same thing to yourself. 

So it’s finally time to view yourself, spiritually, in the correct way – with acceptance.  Stop and remember that you’re good enough right now, and that you have always been loveable as a person.  Whatever you’ve done before, let it go and lift a ton of weight off of your shoulders by affirming: I now release any and all burdens of judging myself into the eternal spirit of divine love, where I am unconditionally loved and perpetually accepted as I am.  I no longer judge myself and forever see myself as blameless and innocent!   By offering yourself this supreme gift, you will be surprised at how much better you will feel!

Then, here is a special day-by-day tip: Police yourself every day and make sure that you are replacing the old habits of judging others and yourself with blessing not only them, but also you. 

By not judging, you are free!

By not judging, we free ourselves: from personal attack, criticism, condemnation, and judgment, both internally within us and externally by others.  This greatly improves our physical, emotional, and spiritual health, mental state and finances as well. We will also attract others who accept us and appreciate us in every corner of life, even down to the strangers we encounter out in public.  By releasing judgment of others and ourselves, there is no longer that open door for others to enter our space and attack us.  We have closed that door, locked it, and thrown away the key.  We now become as free as the eagles soaring above the sky.

By judging, we’ve tried to play God, but in doing so, we show how little we really spiritually know.  We also tip our hands to our unabashed arrogance, as we are literally saying that we’re better or more qualified than God by condemning others.  

Our concept of God as some finger pointing, mean spirited, perfectionist, forever berating Supreme Being who sends us into hell’s inferno forever if we’ve been bad is simply not true.  That perception is based on our human distortion. 

Rather, a higher power should be thought of as the most unconditionally loving parent a child could ever want.  There is no judgment, criticism, intolerance, condemnation and punishment – there is only pure, unconditional love and acceptance for all of us, regardless of who we are and what we’ve done! 

It’s like having a parent who welcomes you with open arms and a warm hug, regardless of whatever has happened in your journey.  Think of those moments in your life when you may have felt that love: Opening a wondrous Christmas gift from your parents when you were a small child, feeling so utterly secure being carried to bed by a parent or loved one when you were a toddler, or being tucked into bed at night with a gentle kiss.  There was a feeling of compete safety, peace, security, and joy.  Now, if you can imagine that feeling magnified incalculably, that is how you are spiritually viewed and regarded by divine love, forever.

If we raise our perception and understanding to not only mentally grasp, but truly feel our concept of God as the eternal, everlasting and pure consciousness of unconditional love that simply is, how could we ever judge anyone or ourselves again?  Think if it: If a higher power doesn’t judge, then how and why could we?  It begs this simple truth: If all of us are good enough for God, so to speak, then we’re good enough for ourselves!

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